Owen

Some things make you feel old. For me this week it's Owen. He is 9, tall and so grown up. I love this boy more than anything. My kids are my whole world. I love watching him grown up, learn new things and just amaze me day after day. I am one lucky mama!

This is me

As a woman, I wear lots of hats. I'm a wife, a mother, a friend, a sister, a neighbor, an advocate, a chef, a driver...it goes on an on. I know who I am. I am a happy and hard working woman. I try, I fail, I try again. This is the story of my life. And most of the time I am really okay with it. I know that I am never going to win wife or mother of the year or that I won't make us millions, but I have a job. I have a purpose. I am here to make life as good as I can for my family as well as for me.

My goal in this life is to work hard and make others feel loved. I tend to think about this more when someone else looks more put together or does more with their kids, or whatever it is. It's always been interesting to me how easy it is to compare, but so much harder to see the good within the flaws. Thank you for listening, hearing and caring. We are all wonderful and have a part to play.

Mother's Day

   I am so blessed to be a mother. I am so blessed to have two boys that I love. I want to like Mother's Day...I really do. But I won't lie, sometimes it's just painful. I think a lot of the gratification of being a mother is the reward of affection, hugs and words of gratitude from your child. I ache for that sometimes and I struggle when I see what my world is. My kids aren't very affectionate (especially Owen) and they don't have the verbal skills to say thank you and I love you...

  

That small part of my life is hard. Watching other kids what mine aren't doing is hard. Wondering how long my life will look like this is hard. But, I look at the good kids I have, how happy they are, how smart they are and how hard they try. It doesn't take all the pain from my mother heart, but it does ease the ache. I love my boys more than anything and I feel so honored to be their mom.

Life

My life is full. My life is crazy. My life is really good. Sometimes I feel like I talk a little too much about autism, but I honestly don't know how to not do that. It's my world, it's my every day. It affects how we all eat, how we sleep, the function of every day...I learned a long time ago that life is what you make it. Every single day for me holds challenges, adjustment and change. Lucky for me, I think most people are the same. We all have things in life that we can't control or change, but we can control our actions and thoughts. I wish I could say that every day brings a fresh perspective, but some days are wonderful and some are really really hard.

I think the best thing that I've learned especially lately, is to be grateful and mindful of blessings. There is a lot of hard in my life, but is undeniably a lot of good too. Kids that show growth and improvement in any form, happy kids, a loving husband, good teachers, good therapists, supportive family...the list goes on and on. I am so blessed autism or not. Nothing good in my life is limited to me when I can focus on the good. I truly am blessed!