We have had a lot of things going on with us lately. We sold a car, we bought a minivan, we are finishing our downstairs bathroom, I just finished a baseball season,
YW,
EQ, attempting to workout and eat better, changing up our menu, Owen's classes, preparing him for preschool (in December), starting him on a gluten-free diet, Will teething and trying to stop nursing.
And of course there is more of life that just happens. I understand life is busy for everyone, but I got to the point where it all felt like it was coming at me at once. I wasn't hardly sleeping, I would remember to eat only because I was so hungry by the time I got around to it, I felt like I wasn't doing enough for my kids and so on...
My stomach was in knots for about a week or so and then my sweet friend watched our kids so that
Zac and I could go to the temple. About halfway through the session, I felt like I took my first breath. And the muscles in my stomach loosened up. Well, then I was sick for 4-5 days and life wasn't slowing down, if anything else...it moved faster and I was trying to keep up with it. Then, last Thursday morning (about 4 a.m.) I started feeling like I couldn't breath.
This really freaked me out and as much as I tried to avoid it, I was starting to hyperventilate. My body started tingling and I felt like there was a large weight in my stomach making it really difficult to breath. My hands and head began to shake uncontrollably so I took a bath and tried to calm down and screamed for
Zac when I literally couldn't feel my legs. He packed up the kids and ran me to the ER.
I got an IV and oxygen and tried to calm down, while
Zac made arrangements for the kids. They did x-rays and an ultrasound to check everything. Everything for the most part checked out okay, but they want me to follow up at the later date. So after a priesthood blessing and a very full day, I went home and slept more than I had in weeks.
Zac took care of everything...he watched the kids, he checked on me periodically and made sure I had water, medicine and sleep. I was so grateful for him and everything he sacrificed for me those couple of days.
After a little more sleep and a long, hard to hear, but necessary talk from my dad, I was ready to face the world again. I started to see evidence of my Savior everywhere. The talk I just
referred to, for a starter. Then I was reading a book that I borrowed from a friend called "A Quiet Heart" by Patricia Holland, and she talked about how the Savior has already been through it all and is ready to comfort us, good friends and neighbors helped watch our kids and bring us meals for a few days, and the kids were both happier.
Sometimes life gives you just about everything you can handle, but I really feel that through all of this, I have been so blessed and I see the obvious need for balance in my life. For me, for
Zac, and for my kids. I think I learned that I need to take care of me every once and awhile and it's okay to let other people help and that everything is going to be okay. Just one day at a time.
